Before

Before this weight came crashing down, I was fine and able to cope with daily life….
I have came a long way, struggled time and time again….
My anxiety and depression has become worse and slowly losing a sense of control.

I try to relax and say I am ok, I say don’t feel sick and make your belly hurt, I have people around me who support me and love me…
I can’t seem to get better, I want to cry when I wake up in the mornings and have to get out of bed to go to this course….

I want to be free from this anxiety, this shakiness that keeps happening to me….I want to finally be happy because I’m an adult!!

In the next few months I will try and over come this :/ I just hope I do before its too late.

10/11/2015

As of today I walked through town wondering where things will be taking me. I managed to join an agency but won’t be starting work until the 23rd of November!!

Job centre has been giving me a hard time and my mum isn’t being as supportive as she used to be. I’ve grown up to be working things out most of the time alone, I sometimes cry uncontrollably and I feel my heart ache hard.

I’ve been reading a book lately its called Wolf Born by N. Gosney, its really amazing. If you like wolf type books with a little romance and blood then you’ll like this 🙂
I have been tired a lot lately and I can’t understand why, I have been socializing a lot more with friends and family but they’ve not really got back to me through texts.

Where life is taking me…

I’ve been meaning to write for quite sometime but I have been so busy lately with my life. I am not 100% sure if things are going well but what I do know is that I am making a start with a positive effect.

I do barely have anyone around me but what I do know is that I have people who care and ones that I can trust….
This year I have been on holiday, it wasn’t somewhere big but it was somewhere that I could relax  and take my mind off of the real and stressful world. I was able to laugh and not look behind me, I was able to talk and not have people judge me.

After a full day of shopping and going to the beach I was able to go back to the caravan, put my aching feet on the sofa and watch a movie with my family with popcorn. I made cups of teas and coffees, the sun was red hot and I was burnt to a crisp to the point of soreness and peeling. I didn’t really care whilst I was in the sun because it was really nice and I even went in the sea, normally I am really scared of it but I went up to my hips in water.

The place was called skegness, UK. I had good luck I suppose because normally the weather isn’t very nice. I have been offered a job with a care company so I hope that it goes really well and that I can really settle in a job and begin my life’s journey.

Thank you for reading, I wonder if you have experienced anything like this that I have, please do share below.